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More like guidelines and a lot less like definitions.

Abusive Behaviour

Abusive behavior is important to talk about in the context of a BDSM site. While forms of roleplay exist, they should exist for the mutual benefit and consensual needs of all participants.

When one or more of behaviors becomes emotionally, mentally, physically, financially, or sexually detrimental or harmful, it crosses into a boundary that is deemed abusive. Healthy relationships, even those based in power exchange, domination or submission, or any extremes in terms of relationships should still preserve basic human rights, dignity, and basic care and well-being.

When relationships exceed these boundaries, the results can manifest as long term physical or mental harm, manipulation or coersion, and detriment to an individuals goals, values, hopes, and future plans.

If you are in a relationship that makes you afraid for your physical safety, is belittling or is emotionally traumatizing, imposes controls whom you can contact or other conditions, or is having otherwise negative impacts on your well-being, you may need help.


United States

National Domestic Violence Hotline

  • Phone: 1−800−799−SAFE(7233)

Love is Respect – National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline

  • Phone: 1 (866) 331 – 9474
  • Text: 22522

Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender National Hotline

  • Phone: 1 (888) 843 – 4564
  • Youth Talkline: 1 (800) 246 – 7743
  • Senior Helpline: 1 (888) 234 – 7243
  • Email: [email protected]

Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) – Sexual Assault Hotline

  • Phone: 1 (800) 656-4673
  • Available: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week via phone and online chat.

Department of Defense (DOD) Safe Helpline for Sexual Assault

  • Phone: 1 (877) 995 – 5247
  • Available: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week via phone and online chat.


Numero anti violenza e stalking

  • Phone: 1522
  • Available: 24/7 from within Italy (both landline and mobile phone)
  • Languages: Italiano, English, Français, Español, فارسی , عَرَبِيّ Shqip, Русский, Українська, Português, Polski.

Gay Help Line (telefono amico per persone LGBTQ*)

  • Phone: 800 713 713
  • Available: Monday to Saturday from 4pm to 8pm

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