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FetLife Rules & Policies

Safety, Privacy, Authenticity, and more

Suicidal Thoughts & Self-Harm

IMPORTANT: If you're struggling with thoughts of suicide or self-harm, you're not alone. Help is available.

One of the most beautiful things about FetLife is that people can be their true selves and share both the ups and downs of their lives. For some, FetLife may be the only place where they feel they can reach out for help during their hardest moments. For others, this is the place where they feel most understood—it’s home, shared with their chosen kink family.

When a member is struggling with thoughts of suicide, we reach out to the member with resources and provide someone to talk to. For safety reasons, we also lock the suicidal content to private, preventing comments from non-friends that may not help when the person is feeling at their lowest.

What falls under this guideline?

Examples include, but are not limited to:

  • Actively attempting suicide
  • Looking for instructions on how to end one's life
  • Posting goodbye messages that suggest suicidal intent
  • Looking for help committing suicide

What does not fall under this guideline?

Examples include:

  • Talking about past suicidal thoughts without promoting them
  • Sharing personal struggles without mentioning suicidal intent
  • Intellectual discussion

How do I report a potential risk of suicide?

Report a potential risk as follows:

  1. Visit the page with the potentially concerning material
  2. Select "...", “More”, or “Options”, then select “Report”
  3. Select “Content Not Permitted” or "Other Reason"
  4. Select "Next"
  5. Add any additional information
  6. Select "Report"

For more general information on reporting, please visit: Submitting a Report.

Who can report a potential risk of suicide?

Anyone who comes across a member who is struggling with thoughts of suicide.

What happens if someone is struggling with thoughts of suicide?

If we believe that a member is engaging in an active suicide attempt, we reach out to the member with support resources as well as to offer them someone to talk to. We then contact local authorities to do a wellness check. For safety reasons we also lock the content containing suicidal thoughts private.

If we do not believe the member is engaging in an active suicide attempt but is potentially struggling with suicidal thoughts, we reach out to the member with resources.

Updated