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Kinktionary

More like guidelines and a lot less like definitions.

Pillow Princess

Pillow princess is a LGBTQ+ originating word from lesbian culture. It describes a sapphic woman who would only receive sexual pleasure from a stone top (someone who only gives/performs sexual acts and does not receive). They may choose to only receive for any multitude of reasons, including being accipiosexual, sensory issues, trauma, preference, etc. P

Pillow princesses pair well people who desire to give more than receive, who are more focused on giving pleasure than being pleasured. These dynamics are usually reciprocal in other ways.

This role is often assumed to be submissive but can be displayed in both Dominant and submissive ways.

Controversy

The term pillow princess is also sometimes used as a derogatory term (usually among heteronormative people) to cause insult. It is used interchangeably with "starfish", meaning a woman who is a non-participant in sex. This usage removes the original queer context and has been criticized as sexist.

Within queer communities, some view it as a playful, even affirming term for someone who enjoys being on the receiving end during sex. Others see it as reinforcing stereotypes about laziness, selfishness, or lack of sexual reciprocity. The label can also erase the fact that many people who identify as pillow princesses reciprocate in non-sexual ways within their relationships.

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