Kinktionary - BDSM Dictionary

Welcome to Kinktionary. Kinktionary is BDSM dictionary and encyclopedia for and by kinksters. The BDSM terms found here are built based on contributions from hundreds of FetLife’s 10M+ members. It’s designed to provide a look at kink and BDSM related language, concepts, and community

How did the Kinktionary start?

The Kinktionary project began in 2023 as a community-built glossary to help people understand the language used in kink, BDSM, and other sexual communities. FetLife has long been a place where kink terms circulate, evolve, and sometimes originate. The Kinktionary was created to capture that shared vocabulary and make it easier to find, reference, and learn from. Entries are written, discussed, and revised based on how people in the relevant communities actually use these terms.

In 2025, FetLife added a dedicated staff member and three community Curators to help continue to grow this section of the site.

As FetLife continues to grow, the Kinktionary grows with it through suggestions and contributions from FetLife members. Many of the people who help shape entries have personal experience with the kinks, fetishes, and activities they are writing about. This allows the Kinktionary to reflect lived experience and evolving community knowledge rather than fixed or theoretical definitions.

Today, the Kinktionary serves as both an educational tool and a shared record of how kink language is used. It reflects how people in the community actually use these terms, and aims to evolve as that language changes. It also serves as a way for community knowledge to be shared back with others exploring kink.

How does Kinktionary work?

Kinktionary is a wiki. Any FetLife member can make a suggestion to an existing page or suggest a new page. Each suggestion is read and discussed by Kinktionary’s “Curators.” It’s their job to decide whether the suggestion should be approved. FetLife team members and curators also create entries based on research and interaction with relevant FetLife communities.

As a Wiki, Kinktionary is never perfect, never done. But it is updated, debated, and improved each and every day by people who care about the kink community - and helping others navigate it.

What is Kinktionary for?

Kinktionary is a place to learn about kink, sex, and BDSM-related topics. FetLife members often use it to read up on things they want to know more about. It is also a public part of FetLife, which means it can be accessed by kinky and kink-curious people anywhere.

What can I add to Kinktionary?

FetLife members can add pages and make suggestions about anything they think will be useful to other people in the kink and BDSM community. This includes:

• A term they are hearing or using but don’t see defined (whether in the Kinktionary or elsewhere.)
• A practice, role, event, etc. in which they have personal experience or knowledge.
• Any other relevant page they think might be missing.

We ask that you don’t add:

• Suggestions that have been generated by AI (try to use at least some of your own words).
• Suggestions that aim to coin a new role or term for yourself.
• Suggestions that go against FetLife Rules & Policies.

How can I add something to Kinktionary?

Any FetLife member can suggest a new page for Kinktionary.

To suggest a new page:

• Use the Kinktionary search function to check if a page on the topic already exists. (The system will prevent you from making an exact duplicate, though if you are suggesting a page in a different section than the existing one or with an alternate spelling, this check may not work correctly, so please always search first.)
• If no page exists, scroll to the bottom of any Kinktionary page and click “Suggest New Page.”
• The “Title” field is for the name of the term you are suggesting. The “Body” is where you aim to define that term or provide information to help our Curators define it. The "Section" field is a dropdown where you can select which category this term belongs in. The "Description" field (optional but strongly encouraged) is notes to the curators and others reading the suggestion; that information won’t be included in the Kinktionary page but should be used to explain why you are making the suggestion and link any supporting resources.
• Your suggestion will be sent to our Curators, who will read it and possibly respond with questions or comments.

I don’t agree with the content on a page - what can I do?

FetLife members can suggest changes to any existing Kinktionary page.

To suggest changes to a page:

• Navigate to the page you want to edit using the left-hand menu or the Kinktionary search bar.
• Click “Suggest Edit” at the bottom of that page.
• The page will become editable, and you can add and remove text as you see fit.
• A “before” and “after” view of your changes will be sent to our Curators, who will read your suggestion and possibly respond with questions or comments. If you reply to a comment, please @ mention the person you're replying to so they will get a notification of your reply (only the originator of the suggestion gets notified automatically without @'ing them).

I got a role approved but it's not appearing in the dropdown on my profile. Why not?

Kinktionary and the dropdowns are separate. If you'd also like to see the role in the dropdown menu, we can make that suggestion to the team by contacting [email protected]. (Note that not all suggestions are approved.)

What else can I do to help ensure my suggestion to the Kinktionary gets approved?

Kinktionary’s Curators aim to approve suggestions that improve a page in some way, add useful and additional content/context, or make an existing page more inclusive. We do our best to vet suggestions by using the resources available to us, including FetLife and other online sources.

A suggestion is more likely to be approved if:

• It adds a new term or new information about an existing term.
• It has a clear BDSM/kink/sexual context.
• Links to supporting sources inside or outside FetLife are provided in the description.

Are there other ways I can help with the Kinktionary?

Yes! If you have broader suggestions about the Kinktionary, we also have a group for FetLife members to provide feedback here.

You can also check out any open suggestions and add comments before they are approved or closed. You can do that here. Please remember to @ other members so they can see your comments.

Thanks for visiting!